Archive for October, 2004

Posted: 10/31/2004 in None

Jukebox is done. Now taking requests …


Posted: 10/31/2004 in None

Time to welcome a couple of old friends, Hug Bug and Kaptain, to the blogging world!

In any case, in chatting with Sassy Hermit, I’ve come up with the idea of running a jukebox off of this site. Stay tuned …

Posted: 10/30/2004 in None

Happy Birthday, Cutie!

So nice to have you here!

Posted: 10/30/2004 in None

… yes, I’m still slacking off … well, sort of.

Though I have been rather busy lately, I’ve had little motivation to post here. In fact, I’ve found that I’ve actually had to sit myself down to write this post up. As this was meant to be a form of therapy for me, I should maintain some form of regularity.

So much has happened, and yet, I feel no urge to talk about any of it. Perhaps I’ve gotten a little bored of just posting up the things that ‘happen’ in my life on a day to day basis. I don’t know … anyway …

So I’ve been back here for a couple of days now. The first question I get asked by everyone has been how life has been for me now that I’m back here. This is to be expected. It’s only natural that people should ask; no different than any other time I’ve returned from a trip home. Only this time around, my reaction, I did not expect.

My response, every time thus far, has been “bittersweet”. Of course, everyone one asks why that is. Truth is, it was sweet because I got to spend time with family and friends, and I made some coin working for a couple of clients. It’s bitter because I didn’t get to spend enough time with family and friends, and I had to let some clients go.

Moreover, after some review, I’m now contemplating a move back home. I’m finding myself sleepless these days because of this. My body is really dogging it. My mind just wanders. I’m really torn. On one hand, I desperately want to move home. On the other, I feel it’s best for my future to stay here.

It’s been a blessing to have others around, if not to talk about my problems, but just for the company. Cutie‘s been slowly settling into her place, so I’ve been trying to help her out; so I get to see her plenty. The other night, Baby-J and I sat down to one of our famed multi-hour meals; the ones that often leave both of us in quite the funk.

I caught up with Rugby Chick for a little bit late one night when she asked me to call. It’s practically a full-time job, keeping up with that girl! On occasion, I get to enjoy nice phone chats with Dimples. I really enjoy her company – great charisma, and just so relaxed with her.

Lately, I’ve been chatting with Sassy Hermit into the ungodly hours of the morning. She’s a night owl only rivaled by me, so it seems. This is one young lady who’s truly wise beyond her years.

It’s been nice just being to talk to people about anything. It’s a nice break from my ‘norm‘ of worrying about my life …

Posted: 10/22/2004 in None


When you were here before

Couldn’t look you in the eye

You’re just like an angel

Your skin makes me cry

You float like a feather

In a beautiful world

I wish I was special

You’re so fucking special

But I’m a creep

I’m a weirdo

What the hell am I doing here?

I don’t belong here

I don’t care if it hurts

I wanna have control

I want a perfect body

I want a perfect soul

I want you to notice

When I’m not around

You’re so fucking special

I wish I was special

But I’m a creep

I’m a weirdo

What the hell am I doing here?

I don’t belong here

She’s running out again

She’s running out

She’s run, run, run, run … run …

Whatever makes you happy

Whatever you want

You’re so fucking special

I wish I was special

But I’m a creep

I’m a weirdo

What the hell am I doing here?

I don’t belong here

I don’t belong here …

– Radiohead : Pablo Honey

Posted: 10/20/2004 in None

Okay … Time To Pick Up The Friggin’ Slack …

Having been home this past week or so has been a mixed bag. Homecoming is always sweet as I get to spend time with my loved ones – family and friends. However, my reason for returning was primarily for business, business that did not pan out quite as I would have hoped.

Needless to say, I’ve been rather upset lately. Most of you have noticed and have offered a friendly ear to listen, a shoulder to lean on, a warm hug, or to be my drinking buddy so that I might drown my sorrows in (several) a pint. I sincerely thank you all.

Most notably, Dutchess, for calling long distance from the Netherlands. To you, I send my most deepest apologies for having missed your calls. It’s been a long time since our morning chats. I miss you dearly. I look forward to seeing you over the winter holidays.

I also apologize for not responding to those whom have commented on my blog as of late. Some things are best left in the past, and others I simple do not wish to talk about.

Lately, I’ve been hanging out with Dimples and Sassy Hermit (Yes, I have found that nickname for Gracey‘s little sister!) as I’ve been over servicing their computers. Having been around them is a constant reminder that I’m old. *oi*

I sat down to a cup of joe with Dimples today. I suppose we’re all plagued with our own problems. As friends would often do, we chat about them and try to offer support. However, as much as we try not be let ourselves be reminded of our troubles, our conversations end up finding its way there.

She made a comment that really struck a core. “It’s been a really bad year for a lot of people …,” she said. The last time I heard that was during a long, deep conversation with Baby-J. And the time before that, was in a similar conversation I had with Renka.

It’s true. It has a been a rough year for a lot of people. I’ve seen so many around me endure so much hardship. I know my life has been the shits for a couple of years now. But any of you who know me knows that I’m no quitter.

It’s nothing I can’t handle.

Posted: 10/17/2004 in None

I know I’ve been slacking off from posting as of late. Truth is, either I’ve been busy, trying to enjoy life, or simply can’t be bothered.

Yes, life is not going well for me.

Yes, it certainly seems like life likes to kick me when I’m down.

And no, I don’t want to talk about.

Thank you.