You ever get that feeling where you just don’t give a shit anymore?

Yesterday, I pretty much stayed at home all day, save for a quick trip out to the grocery store, then running into my old field hockey coach outside my house. It was good to see him. It was odd though, as he lives just houses away from me now. He moved into the neighbourhood just as I moved east.

Anyhow, I got the chance to do a lot of work on my computers at home. And those that know me best will know that working on computers pretty much means I sit and think … a lot. And those same people will know that it’s never a good thing when I sit and think … ever.

… *sigh* …

I was chatting with a buddy of mine. He remarked how I’m able to switch roles so easily. While with the ruggers, I’d be one of the boys hanging out, joking around, being stupid, doing even stupider things … until something goes wrong. All of a sudden, I become the big brother. I’ll start assessing the situation, barking orders … cleaning up the mess.

I was a little upset and down while I was chatting with my buddy. It was during this chat that I received word from another friend whom was going through some troubles. My buddy noticed an immediate change in my tone – even noticeable over YIM. I seem to have so many personalities for any given situation or occasion.

It makes me wonder if I’ve become one who can remove himself from oneself. I’ve been referred to as a chameleon by some. Some people have found that they know not what to expect from me at times. In this, some claim that I tend to give myself up too much. Do I really do that?

… & write back @ ya’!

Jovo : Anastacia the A4 … my bad …

Ghis : Yeah, I’ve been managing. Fortunately for me, she’s now off splitting time between being in the middle of nowhere and in a new city where I have little contact with her. It’s not like I’ve really had to deal with it.

And I know full well that I cannot demand, or even ask, that my friends keep their distance from her. It’s not right. But I do have faith in my friendships with my friends. I know that I’m in good standing with them. As a matter of fact, I know I’m still in good standing with her friends.

Thing with my ex is that, at one point very early on in the relationship, I did see my future in her. So she will undoubtedly haunt me for years to come. Sucks to be me …