Posted: 06/01/2004 in None

Okay, so I’m procrastinating. I’m supposed to be sleeping. But no, I’m not even packing … yet. I’m such a bum.

Anyhow, my day started off with me sleeping in. I loved it. I didn’t even want to get out of bed. But, Chip gave me a call to inform me that he and Sans were in town and invited me over for dinner at his sister and brother-in-law’s place down by the beaches.

I like the beaches. So I hear, a ton of west coasters live there because it reminds them of home. I can’t say that I blame them. It’s a great area. Why?because it’s not really Toronto! Chip‘s sister and brother-in-law have a great house. It’s pretty new, and very comfortable. It’s a great place to raise their kids – both of which are simply adorable.

The dinner was lovely, but what really made it great was the company. I miss the family atmosphere. It’s so warm … it makes me feel all fuzzy inside. Moreover, it was a great chance to catch up with Sans and Chip. We literally spent several hours just chatting and filling each other in on our lives.

The evening was not entirely without its worries though. Just before I left my place for dinner, I had received word that Renka‘s ill father has come across some complications.

Needless to say, whenever you hear of such news, your heart sinks a bit. However, soon after my thoughts immediately turn to Renka. I worry about her. I know that she’s always been an independent person – and a strong one at that – but I worry just the same.

She’s one of those people whom when you first meet, you’re simply in awe. She’s a social butterfly and a supportive friend. She has that amazing capacity to be there for her friends. It’s that point that worries me so.

I relate to her being in that position. “If you take care of everyone, who takes care of you?”, Blondie once asked me. I was always that pillar of strength, that guiding light, that life line … that rock. I would be there for my family and friends; no questions asked. If you had a problem, I’d fix it.

I’ve never had too many troubles in my life until these last 3-4 years. Admittedly, at first, I kept it to myself. But in the end, when I did learn to let it out I turned to my friends for support … let me tell you, it made a world of difference.

I know that Renka has a large support group. Of her friends she’s intro’ed me to, I have nothing but nice things to say about them all. She also has her faith in God, and her friends at church offer her much strength, I’m sure. Knowing this puts me to ease a bit.

I gave her a call on my way home from the dinner. She sounded so drained and fatigued. I felt so helpless. If only there was something you could do, you know? … if only … if only …

Seriously, I sit and wonder … given a situation like this, what can you do? Right now, all I’ve done is offer any help that she may need. I’d hate to bother her in any way. I know that I wouldn’t want to talk about my worries more than I needed to.


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