Posted: 09/17/2003 in None

So we lost yesterday. But Seneca didn’t beat us. We did a damn fine job of beating ourselves. Not sitting on excuses, but fact was, our team had only been together for less than a week. We made stupid mistakes, and it cost us. Boohoo …

Anyhow, we were trying to win it for Junior, seeing as it was his birthday. The celebration would have been fun had we won, but getting him totally shit-faced would have been a hell of a night anyway. Unfortunately, mommy and daddy called and ordered our little Junior home. I was told he was near tears when he asked Toothless to drop him off at the bus depot. Shitty deal …

I booked it home, showered up and headed out to The Rugby House to meet up with the guys. The usual guys were there; seemingly all the veterans like Toothless, Danny Boy, Hugh, ‘rik, Kingpin, Dean-O, Scapegoat and Gabey. These guys seem to be the core crew, and they’ve taken on guys like me, Junior, J-Dogg, and Davy as one of their own. We’ve become a pretty tight crew already. We hung for a couple of hours, then found ourselves at Caps to drown our sorrows.

I had an interesting experience at Caps. Kingpin has “Yellow Fever” … big time. And there was this hot little bar tender working that night. She looked to be half Japanese and half Caucasian. Kinda short, but had all the right curves in all the right places. This girl was ‘yummy’. Kingpin turned to me with a nod … “Yo …. wingman …”.

So I walked over and started chatting it up with this girl. Nothing big; just small talk. Kingpin walks over and makes his move. “I’ve got a boyfriend,” she mentions. Shot down. Kingpin grabs me and the beer and head back to the table.

5 minutes later, our little barmaid walks over and taps me on the shoulder. “Can I see you at the bar for a sec?”. So I walked over with her. The guys were wondering what was going on.

Barmaid : “What are you doing with these guys?”
Me : “They’re my team.”
Barmaid : “No, I mean, I can tell that you have so much more class and sophistication than these guys. You’re a good guy. What are you doing with them?”
Me : “They’re my rugby team. We lost our game, looking to slam a few back.”
Barmaid : “Oh yeah … I watch you guys practice.”
Me : “I’ve never noticed you before …”
Barmaid : “Oh, I live in the condos that overlook the fields. I watch you guys all the time.”
Me : “You a rugby fan?”
Barmaid : “A bit … been meaning to get to know the game better.”
Me : “You ought to come on out and watch some of our practices or games. I know that Kingpin there …”
Barmaid : “… whatever … your buddy’s got yellow fever, eh?”
Me : “Well … yeah … Sorry about that.”
Barmaid : “Nah, I’m used to it.”
Me : “So, how often do you get hit on anyhow?”
Barmaid : “A lot … too many … It wouldn’t be so bad if they were the right guys, you know?”
Me : “I hear ya’. It’s okay. He knows you’ve got a boyfriend.”
Barmaid : [smiles] “That line always works.”
Me : [pauses] “You *do* have a boyfriend, right?”
Barmaid : [winks] “… yeah …”
Me : “Ah … fair enough … ” [walks back towards the table]
Barmaid : “By the way … I’m ‘Barmaid’.”
Me : Warz[shakes Barmaid‘s hand]
Barmaid : “See you tomorrow night then.”
Me : “Tomorrow night?”
Barmaid : “Yeah, it’s First Pub Night @ Caps. All the varsity teams are supposed to be here.”
Me : “Oh … tomorrow night then …”

I hit the table. “Did she ask about me?”, Kingpin asks. Sorry. No such luck. “She’s chatting you up … you gonna hit it tonight?”. All the guys are teasing at this point. “No … nah … c’mon, guys … no … seriously … fuck, guys! … NO! …” I barked … “… besides, a gentleman would never tell … so you think there’s any chance I’d tell you shitheads?!”.

Just then, Barmaid brings us a round of drinks on the house. “Hey guys,” she points at me and says, “This is a good one … don’t corrupt him.”. And she walks back to the bar. Warz is so getting his knob polished!” the team barks. The dickheads even toasted to it!

So anyhow … it just begs the question … am I such a goodie-goodie? For someone to just pick me out like that … ??? Odd …

Near the end of the night, I had to book it early as I had class the next day. Kingpin was catching a ride with me. Dean-O was plastered, so I figured I’d send him home. I knew Gabey was on the way, so he hopped a ride with me too. The four or us piled in my car and took off. Got everybody home … Dean-O had his technocolour yawn the moment he stepped into his place. So I’m told, not so much a pretty sight for his roomie the next morning.

Got home, the effects of the game are starting to hit me. Sore shoulders, stiff neck … and 6 blisters the size nickles on my heels. Dammit. Should have broken in my new Canterbury Kaha‘s better before the game. Now I can’t even walk straight.

So some people out there have asked why it is that I tend to write about my rugby and partying … and nothing about school. Well, frankly, school has been pretty damn boring. Not much is happening, and to write about that would be a waste of very little time … little time, but a waste nonetheless. And with that in mind, I’ll leave you with this quote as I think it sums it up best …

“When was the last time 70,000 people came to watch a chemistry experiment?”

James Caan as Coach Winters in “The Program

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